Evolution in a Blog

I have a bottle of shampoo sitting in front of me.

It's close to empty.
It is pink.
It has an attractive, circular, green symbol on the front, with some sort of ivy thing going on. It has a small amount of writing on the front, and more on the back, all of it is ridiculous, or bullshit.

I am relatively ignorant to the sciences of hair care.
The bottle in front of me that the shampoo it contains is particularly good at straightening hair because it contains honeyed pear and silk. This is stunning information. I didn't know silk could be reduced to a liquid form, but if it can (apparently so) I suppose it would be nice in your hair. Honeyed pear sounds like it might smell nice, and I do value a good natural smell over perfume, but I don't know why they used honeyed pears. Perhaps it contains pear and honey, but I can't quite believe they bought pre-honeyed pears to make shampoo with, the same pears some people might eat.

This combination apparently makes for a powerful shampoo that will "straight to your head." The lame appeal to a popular turn of phrase is so unfunny that any association with other head benefits such as a pleasurable non-headache sensation or an improvement in your mental faculty is unlikely. I feel dumber just looking at this thing.

Other tacky lines are listed out on the back: "I think it's better straight than never," "Get in line right here" "for straight sake"... the french translations are so bad shouldn't be mentioned here.

The whole product is said to be "dangerously straight." There is something about it that is subtly dangerous.

I've been looking at this bottle every now and then when I was in the washroom, which I share with two roomates, one of them female, who's hair product this is. The bottle originally appealed to me, when it was new, because its shape and color were quite appealing, and the designs were simple and effective. As I read about it's contents its initial glamour wore off. Soon it's external glamor began to fade, until now it is an almost empty bottle of goo, with a surface that is just smudged and scratched enough to remind that this is a plastic bottle that will be absolutely useless once it is done with.

From this point my mind wandered further... to be continued.

Heretical Slip Up on Q

As the first segment of Q, the popular CBC Radio One show, wrapped up for a news break, the now iconic host Jian Gomeshi, tripped up over the the words "letter" and "later", repeating them out of order several times, before shouting them out angrily in the correct order.

This would have warranted no more than a small titter, except that as the theme music faded out, a soft but still clear heretical blashpheme was heard, uttered by the said icon.

Not only is Jian Gomeshi treading on dangerous ground with iconic status, taking on the role of a false icon, but is now actively besmirching the name of the lord.

Angry protests are already taking place outside of the CBC offices in downtown Toronto, and as word continues to spread, it is likely that the crowd will increase. In all likeliness a riot will soon take place, and CBC Toronto will be leveled to the ground, as if smitten by the Lord.

We desperately urge that Jian Gomeshi publicly apologise to , the entire earth, the heavens above, and he should swear his everlasting soul to the one Lord and saviour, and redeem himself from fiery perdition, where is surely heading.